For Your Children BigGirls Don't Cry - Along with the crisp, fallweather will come the first days of school and, for some, the separation anxietythat goes along with it. ChecksFor Chores - If your kids are anything likemine, getting them to help around the house is sometimes more trouble than it isworth. TheGreat American Food Fight - Foodissues have been plaguing well-intentioned parents for generations. Help! I NeedSummer Care- Multipleoptions are available for summer care for your children. However, the choicescan be confusing and overwhelming. ItOnly Takes a Minute -Like most,I am a watchful parent, I have even been told I am actually over-protective, butI am also among the many parents today who have a full load of responsibilitiesin addition to caring for my child. It's Storytime atGrandparent's House - ChildrensBook by Marge Alexander KeepReading- Keeping your child reading through the summerimproves theirretention MovingWith Children - Children need a lot of extra attention from caregivers duringa move PottyPlay - Thesetraining tips can help make learning to use the potty fun for you both. PromotingGood Dental Health - "Doctor, How old shouldmy child be when I first bring them in for a check-up?" RaisingYour Spirited Child byMary Sheedy Kurcinka, M.A. (Book Review) SummerSolutions - If youre like most working parentsof school age children, the summer months present a special challenge. Tipsand Hints on What to Do Before You Leave! - Leavingyour children with a babysitter can be an anxious time. Waysto Teach Children Financial Responsibility - Howmany frustrated parents have expressed similar sentiments about how theirchildren mismanage money?
Big GirlsDon't Cry by Beth Bokunewicz As the summer winds down, September isfast approaching. Along with the crisp, fall weather will come the first days ofschool and, for some, the separation anxiety that goes along with it. One of the questions we as afacility-screening agency ask the directors is How do you deal withseparation anxiety? The most common answer is we tell the parents to justrelax and theyll be alright. It sounds strange but the parents weregenerally more upset than the kids. Sure, there is always the initial fear whena child is thrust into a new environment, but that quickly fades as the dailyroutine and fun begin. I was a preschool/Kindergarten teacher forthe local school district for 7 years and Ive seen my share of separationanxiety. The children clawing at theyre parents shirt, the screaming andcrying (and Im not just talking about the children), and the upset parentspacing outside the school, just in case! We learn to calm the children andredirect their attention to distract them. We are taught to put the parents mindat ease by showing them that the behavior is normal and that the kids will bejust fine. Its the expected first-day-blues. This all sounds so trivial from theteachers point of view. This year, however, for the first time I will beexperiencing it from the other side of the coin. My first baby, my five year oldis entering Kindergarten. I practically had to take a sedative just to sign herup at the local elementary school. How am I going to handle this very importantjourney into her educational experience? These are some helpful hints to helpyou and your child make a smooth transition into the first day of school. -
Talk about school for a few months ahead. Bring it up casually and try to create a comfortable feeling about school. -
Invite your child to ask questions. The more a child knows, the less scary it will seem. -
Never use phrases like it wont be scary when addressing the subject. Try to stick to facts about what they will experience and keep your opinions to yourself. If you try to hard to convey excitement, they may see through to your anxiety. -
Read age appropriate books about school. Children can get a sense of what to expect from these stories. -
Do something special for the first day. Maybe a special breakfast or a new hair ribbon might create some excitement. -
Let them help pick out school supplies and school clothes. Nothing induces excitement quicker than the thought of being able to sport something new and special. -
Visit the school ahead of time and try to schedule an appointment to meet the teacher. -
Be sure your child knows that you will be back when school is over. Show them the clock if they seem upset and show them what the clock looks like when its time to leave. -
Kiss your child goodbye at the door and promptly turn to leave. The more you linger, the harder it will be to leave. Dramatic exits only work well in the movies. In real life it just creates more anxiety. -
If you feel compelled to stay around to put your mind at ease, do it outside where you can hear whats going on or ask a passing employee to peak in and check on your child. Themore information you pass to your child and the less you worry, the smoothertransition you and your child will experience on their first day of school.Backto Top
Checks for Chores By Cheryl Best If your kids are anything like mine, getting them to help around the house is sometimes more trouble than it is worth. I marvel at the way my four-year-old has boundless energy when pulling out every Barbie accessory she owns, but shes "too tired" to put even one item away. Then theres our seven-year-old, who gets so focused on his Gameboy he forgets to eat, but is endlessly distracted when asked to make his bed. Sick and tired of yelling, threatening and punishing, I knew there had to be a better way. Well, Ive found a solution that works for our family. We call it The Check System and we love it. It is visual, goal oriented and, best of all, it works. The idea is simple. Use a whiteboard to list each name and chore category. Each chore equals one check, and four checks equal a dollar. Bigger chores are worth more checks. Checks are gained for accomplishing tasks or lost for misbehavior. Weve categorized chores by each room. Washing the dishes, mopping the floor or taking out the trash all fall under "Kitchen". We also added categories for homework and attitude. Personalize your board to work for your family. My favorite category is "the Blitz". When youve got kids you are constantly picking things up. Now this mundane chore has become fun. We announce a blitz is coming up, set the timer for five minutes, assign each person an area or team up with smaller children, and ready, set, go. The kids see it as a contest and are suddenly putting things away at lightening speed. Five minutes later, the house is straightened and everyone gets a check. Goal setting is an important part of making the Check System work. The kids tell us what their saving their checks towards. We list the cost of the item and how many checks it takes to earn that item. Once a week we total the checks and cash out. This helps make the value of the checks clearer, especially to smaller children, to whom money is still a pretty abstract concept. Another benefit of the Check System is as a consequence for misbehavior. One day last week, we discovered a whole bag of candy wrappers hidden upstairs. Apparently, our little angels pilfered a bag of chocolates from the kitchen and proceeded to have a candy party. Once discovered, they had to clean up their mess (no check for this chore) and then decide on the consequence; no computer time for one day or the loss of two checks. They opted for losing computer time. Now just the threat of a lost check gets their cooperation. Not only has the Check System been effective in getting out kids to do their chores, it has also been a good lesson in economics. Now, when they see something they want, they save their checks for it. They are learning to make financial decisions, like "If I use my checks to buy that Pokemon, I wont have enough to buy the Hot Wheel tracks Ive been saving for." Living within your means is a valuable lesson to learn at any age. Books Parentingwith Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility
Author:Foster Cline Publisher:Pinon Press ChoresWithout Wars
Author:Lynn Lott Publisher:Prima Communications, Inc. Free Softwarehttp://enternet.softseek.com/SWAT (TheShareware Authors Toolkit) helps automate many of the routine chores ofshareware authors. SoftSeek.com-Chores and Rewards providesa system to manage chores, rewards, and penalties, while teaching your childrenresponsibility and accountibility Backto Top
TheGreat American Food Fight ByBeth Bokunewicz Children are starving in othercountries! Those words stillthunder in my head from my mothers dainty lips whenever there was food lefton my plate. I grew up in a worldof No dessert until you clean your plate. Unfortunately, this mentality caused many eating disorders in mygeneration. I am living proof. Even more unbelievable, I still hear the same song ringing inthe homes of many of my friends. Sadly,these same friends have children with obesity or weight problems. Foodissues have been plaguing well-intentioned parents for generations. Most likely, it began in lean years when our grandparents or great-grandparents were living during the depression era. They did not waste food because they werent sure when they weregetting their next meal. Today, formost Americans, food is abundant. So,why do we continue to pressure our children over this issue? The answer is simple. Weteach our children the lessons we were taught. Whatif we decided not to make an issue around food? Would our children begin to be wasteful? Would they eat only junk food and processed meals? Would they become malnourished? According the American Pediatric Association, a child between the ages of2 and 6 only needs about 2 tablespoons of food per day to survive. Thatdoesnt mean, of course, that we should stop being diligent with ourchildrens nutrition. It means if you have a child who doesnt eat three square meals a day,they wont starve to death. As a matter of fact, a healthy child will neverstarve to death and will eat when their body needs energy and nutrients. Food isenergy and because children arent inclined to eat for no reason they willgenerally eat to satisfy a need for energy. This is probably a lesson we couldall stand to learn. I dont know about you but I eat because Im bored,depressed, in a binge mode, having a pig out party, and a multitude of reasonscompletely unrelated to a need for energy or nutrients. So,then, what do we do about the constant battle over our desire to feed and theirneed to have independence about what they eat, when, and how much? Well, theanswer is not easy and it differs for each child. Ifyou are trying to get a child to try new and healthy foods you may need to offera favorite, not so healthy food, next to a new or less favorite healthierchoice. Ask them to take a designated amount of bites of the less favorite ornew food along with the favorite food. (Make the bites reasonable like 2 or 3and maybe you can slip 1 or 2 more in at the end of the meal.) Tryto avoid using food as a reward. This only reinforces the emotional attachmentto food. Also, dont use dessert as a reward for a clean plate. Again, you areinadvertently instilling a habit in your child that could cause eating problemslater in life. My business partner had a friend in college who was raised to clean herplate and literally could not stand to leave food on her plate even if she wasfull (she was also overweight). Tryto make meals fun and always offer a fruit and/or a vegetable with every meal.Even if they dont eat it every time, at least they will consider those foodsa part of a balanced meal. When they get older and develop a larger menu theywill most likely include those items in their diet. Tryto refrain from putting pressure on a child regarding the amount of food or thechoices they make. My friends daughter is very tall and lean for her age. Sheis generally a picky eater and, as a result, my friend designates how many bitesshe needs to take during a meal. This child is so focused on the amount she musteat that she doesnt enjoy her food and worries about the issue before sheeven sits at the table. As long as they are getting some food and liquids duringthe day, they wont starve. If you are truly concerned about the nutritionyour child is getting try a natural supplement such as Yummy Bears vegetablesubstitute. They are completely natural and taste just like gummy bears. Finally,do talk to your children about healthy eating and the importance of goodnutrition. Helpthem see eating healthy as a way to grow strong and big like mom and dad. Find books that you can read to them that teach them in fun way abouteating healthy. You may gradually see this information make its way to the table and theywill start to ask for healthy foods on their own.
Help! I Need SummerCare By Beth Bokunewicz Youve already set up your childcare for the summer?My neighbor asked me in a panic. How can you think about summer while theresstill snow on the ground? Am I too late? For all of you busy parents (andprocrastinators), no, its not too late. But its time to get started! Timeto start exploring summer care options. Multiple options are available for summer care for yourchildren. However, the choices can be confusing and overwhelming. Should youchoose summer day camp, overnight camp, nannies, family daycare homes,recreation centersor the countless other options? Would my children enjoybeing at a campground, a park, a city-run playground, or in my own homewhoever said parenting was easy? Here are the most popular options, pros and cons and somethings to look for to help you feel secure about the choice you make for yourchildren. Camps: Overnight, Daytime, Religious, Specialty, Specialneeds, and Recreation Centers. The most popular option for children over the age of 5 yearsis the summer camp program. Many camps are advertised in parent publications,the phone book, and lists can be found on your states website. Pros -
Camps generally offer a variety of activities. -
Transportation is frequently included. -
The staff is often qualified in education. -
Children can develop a love for the outdoors and develop skills they might not have available elsewhere. -
Develop long-lasting friendships and social skills. -
Fresh air! Cons -
Your child will be in a group of approximately ten (10) children, if not more. The day is rigorously scheduled leaving them little freedom of choice. -
If children arent comfortable with an activity, feeling forced to participate can make their experience unpleasant. Camps generally do not cater to a wide diversity of interests. -
It can become very hot and uncomfortable. -
Prolonged exposure to the sun. -
Some camps are run at state parks with inadequate facilities or have poorly kept equipment. -
Indoor activities may be limited when the weather is bad. Next are some helpful tips to use when exploring camp as anoption. Check the campgrounds once camp is in session. This can be done the summer prior to signing up or in the first weeks of camp. You may need to pay in advance to reserve a space but a reputable camp will offer your money back if youre not satisfied with what you see. You may even be able to do a trial run with a money back guarantee. Find out the credentials and experience of the director. The director should have a degree or experience in recreation or education with, at least, 2 years of experience running a camp. Preferably the director works with children during the school season. This is especially important in the case of a specialty or special needs camp. Find out what they do during inclement weather days. Do they spend the day watching movies, go on field trips to local points of interest, or have free indoor play all day? Your child should be stimulated (and not by the television) every day. Find out the staff turnover rate. Do the same counselors return every summer? Do they have staffing issues during the summer? A high turnover rate can be a clue. Unhappy staff may mean an unhappy camper (i.e. your child). What are the qualifications of the counselors, and other personnel who have daily contact with your children? These people will influence your children for a good portion of the summer. As in any childcare profession, qualified staff is difficult to find. Camp jobs are physically demanding and the pay is frequently low. Staff is required to be on duty from early in the morning until late at night. Make sure a good portion of the staff has previous experience working with children! How is the staff expected to handle conflicts or discipline? A friend of mine has a child who returned early from overnight camp last summer because the counselor repeatedly disciplined him in front of his peers. This is never appropriate! The counselors tend to be young and dont always know the appropriate way to handle a conflict situation. Find out what is expected from counselors to avoid an unpleasant experience for your child. How often is the equipment checked for safety? How often is it replaced? If the camp is under funded or too concerned about overhead costs, the directors may be hesitant to invest in new equipment. Be sure the equipment is relatively new and in good condition. Be sure there is soft surface under climbing equipment, quality life jackets for boating, toys with no broken pieces or sharp edges, no peeling paint on equipment, and the buildings and lean-tos are regularly checked for safety. What is their security system? Be certain there is some measure of security. A guard at the front gate, visitor passes, sign-in or out books, and escorts. Strangers should not have the ability to roam the grounds. Daycare Facility Camps This is a very popular choice for children under the age of 5.Frequently, parents enroll their children in a preschool or daycare and continuecare during the summer. Pros -
If your child attends the same daycare during the rest of the year, they will benefit from the consistency of being around the same teachers and their friends. -
More structure than a private sitter. -
Less expensive than a private sitter or camp. -
Builds social skills. -
Provides a secure environment. -
Less exposure to the elements. -
More educationally oriented. Cons -
Unfortunately, many programs run on a Summer Schedule. They may not have the same routines so there will be some adjustment for your child. -
There may not be many educational elements and a lot of time in the school playground. If the program is not suitable, there is nothing wrong with removing the child for the summer and returning them in the fall. -
Very little opportunity for new experiences. To be well informed about the program, follow theseguidelines. What will they be doing all summer? Be sure you know what your child will be doing, who will be caring for them, and what activities are planned. The days activities are generally much less structured and less educationally geared. What is the policy regarding television use? Even facilities that frown on heavy television use may allow much more during the summer. Is the summer program staffed by the same teachers your child had during the school year? Very often the staff is cut because attendance is low. Some facilities use inexperienced staff fresh from high school to cut costs. Be sure you know the qualifications of the summer staff. What trips will be taken? How often will they be away from the center? Who will supervise trips? How appropriate are the destinations? (Your 3 year old shouldnt be taken to the Museum of Fine Arts unless they offer age appropriate programs for preschoolers.) Summer Nanny This option is becoming increasingly more popular. People havefound having a college student with childcare experience is a great choice,especially if you have more than one child. Pros -
Your children will have the benefit of doing what they want and going where they like with the one-on-one attention of a caring individual. The cost for a nanny can be as low as $8.00 per hour. When you calculate the cost of paying for your children to go to a camp or facility, this option can be less expensive. -
If you hire a childcare provider who brings their own child, the cost can be even lower! -
You can prepay for tickets to local museums, zoos, shows, and other points of interest to offer your children a fun-filled and stimulating summer. -
More flexibility for you, the parent. Cons -
Fewer opportunities for social development and interaction with peers. -
Less structure. -
No supervision for caregiver. -
Some preparation on your part may be necessary. -
If you or your child develops a personality conflict with the caregiver, you may be left in a difficult position without a backup caregiver. -
Less guaranteed continuity. If your caregiver is ill or unreliable, you wont have a backup. Follow these guidelines to ensure quality care from a nanny. Do they have experience working with young children? Have them tell you about any previous childcare experience. If you have young children, be sure they understand developmental levels. Request at least 2 professional references and 2 personal references for you to call. Find out their philosophies on childrearing, education, discipline, and nutrition. Be careful not to lead their answers. Avoid making a judgment about someone before youve interviewed him or her. (A good questionnaire can be found online under Childcare Providers on this website.) Meet the caregiver in their home first. People feel more secure in their environment. They will be more likely to show you their real personality whether that be positive OR negative. Be sure to have a reputable investigative agency run criminal clearances on your caregiver. Data-quik, a national investigation agency, can find out anything you need to know about the caregiver you choose. Log onto www.Data-quik.com or call them toll free at 1-800-206-5025. Dont make the mistake of listening to someone elsesopinion. Very often parents blindly follow the lead of other parents.Unfortunately, that parent may not have any more knowledge than you.Additionally, their standards may not meet yours. Know the right questions toask and what to look for in a quality operation. For further information callChild Care Choices, Inc. at Toll Free 1-877-SIT-4YOU. We can help you make thebest choice for all of your childcare needs. Backto Top
ItOnly Takes a MinuteByRenee Byrd Recentlymy husband and I took our 2-1/2 year old son to the local playground to play.There were a couple of other boys there who were older between the ages of 5 and7. My son loves to play with other boys especially older ones, so when hewent over and was talking to them, I kept a close eye and my heart swelled withpride - they were playing together! Whenthe two boys had to leave to go home, my son followed and I was close behindthem telling him he had to stay with me. The 5 year old offered to take mylittle boy home with him. I laughed and thanked him and thought how sweetas I retrieved my son. Afterthe boys left and my son had moved on to the slide, my husband said, See howeasy it would be? I didnt understand, easy what? My husband said, Do you see how easy it would be to lureour son away? He was talkingabout the 2 boys and of course there was no evil intent on the 5 and 7 year oldto lure our son away. In an instantI realized my husband was right. It would only take 60 seconds to lure myloving, trusting child away from me! Itwas also in that moment I realized how many dangers in our world there truly areand how many times it would have only taken a minute for my son to disappear. Minutes in the store when my back was turned grabbing for the milk,butter, eggs, or whatever, and that minute when I had turned around to see asweet little old lady or man talking to my son. Likemost, I am a watchful parent, I have even been told I am actuallyover-protective, but I am also among the many parents today who have a full loadof responsibilities in addition to caring for my child. In between juggling work, monitoring daycare/ school, handling doctor anddentist appointments, sporting events, play dates, home businesses, shopping,meetings and the holidays (and for most parents it doesnt end there). We all have to become wizards at scheduling and our main focus duringthis ordered chaos is to keep an attentive eye on our children. Evenat the safest moments things can happen, sometimes they are funny and sometimesthey are downright scary - for example the time my son ran behind the counter ata shoe store and turned off the ladys cash register (this happened lastweek), or the many times he has grabbed something that he wasnt supposed to.All parents know how long it takes for chaos to break loose, seconds! Withour lives being so busy, it is easy to forget it only takes a minute to give ahug or kiss, to say I love you, to play with toy cars, to color, to say aword of encouragement, AND it only takes a minute for all of that to disappear. Thatis why I try to stick to some very simple common sense rules to help make suremy child is safe. -
Never leave your child alone in a car. Not even for a second! -
Young children should always be supervised in any public place. -
Know where your children are at all times. ASK QUESTIONS! -
Always accompany your child to a public restroom. -
Keep recent photos of your child just in case. -
Do not put your childs name on the outside of their clothing. -
Teach your child to tell you immediately if something bad happens or if they feel uncomfortable or scared with another adult, teenager or child. -
Be sensitive to your childs behavior. Follow your intuition. -
Teach your child that it is okay to say No to an adult. -
Make sure your child knows their name, address and phone number and if possible an emergency number. -
Be aware if a teenager or adult is paying an unusual amount of attention to your child. -
Keep a first aid book by the phone in your home along with emergency phone numbers to the local police and fire department teach your child 911 Itmay take a little extra time and effort to follow these simple rules, however itis very easy for the minutes to slip by us and sometimes we all need a littlereminder that it will only take a minute. SmartAlecEnterprises isa family owned business in Portland, Oregon whose goal is to provideparent-helping products that promote safety and education through play. SmartAlec Enterprises currently offers unique photo ID for children,photo baby announcements, personalized sketchbooks and we are pleased toannounce that we are a proud distributor of ID Inside Child IdentificationWristbands. SmartAlec Enterprises (503) 890-1289 PO Box 83036 Portland, Oregon, 97283 www.smartalec.bigstep.com smartalecent@aol.com Backto Top
Its Storytime at the Grandparents House ChildrensBook by Marge Alexander Review By Melinda Izzo It all started when my niece, Kim and her family moved to Italy. My sisterMarge wanted a way for her grandkids to experience the fun and joy oftraditional American holidays. She also wanted a way to pass on her familysheritage. At first she bought books about holiday celebrations to send to them.Later she started e-mailing stories she wrote herself based on actualexperiences from her familys past. The idea behind these stories is quiteclever: Marge imagined what would happen if her holiday decorations came to lifeand could talk! In this book, the stories dont start with once upon atime. They begin with deep in the basement of the grandparents house.Sounds a little scary, but the stories are really quite pleasant. The stories delighted my nieces children. Soon the wordspread about the effect her tales had on kids, and before long, Marge wasgetting requests to write more stories. Even her husband took time out of fromhis busy electrical contracting business to collaborate with her and developstory ideas. Then Marge started getting requests from various childrensgroups to come and read her adventures. Wherever Marge goes to share herstories, children are captivated. Not only are her stories fun, they also teach valuablelessons. These stories capture the imaginations of children and adults alike.Christmas decorations, a Teddy bear, an Easter bunny, an antique rocketlauncher, along with many others, have been creatively brought to life to teacheternal values of family and faith, says Pastor Steve Dunklee of Brattleboro,VT. The thought of putting these stories together into a booknever occurred to Marge until one of her grandkids, said, This should be in abook, Grandma. By the time she was done, Marge had written stories to coverall of the major holidays. Of her stories, Marge says, my hope is that theywill not only be fun for parents and grandparents to read to their kids andgrandkids, but that they will also stimulate storytelling in these families aswell. Children need to have a sense of belonging and what better way todemonstrate your love to them than reading together. Backto Top
Expertsagree keeping your child reading through the summer months improves theirretention and comprehension when they return to school in the fall. Many teachers complain about the amount of reviewingthey have to doin class every fall. If you and your child have been caught up in summer fun,its not too late to prepare for school. Here are some suggestions and tips to keep summer learning fun. 
Read, Read, ReadAnHour a Day- Set aside a time to read each day, maybe right after lunch, in thehottest part of the day, or right after dinner . ReadAloud or take turns reading- even listening to a book can expand your childsattention span and vocabulary
MakeFun Book Selections- If your child enjoys what he/she is reading they will bemore apt to continue reading. IfHarry Potter is too weighty and the Summer Book selections are too dry, ourseven-year-old has a new favorite Captain Underpants these clevercomic-style books are silly, gross and funny enough to keep your child wantingmore. Libraryreading programsTakeadvantage of the summer reading programs at most local libraries. Read-a-thons and book clubs are great fun and really can inspire yourchilds reading with some healthy competition. SillyPoemsMakeup silly poems and rhyming songs and encourage your child to ad verses. Have them notice the rhythm and the rhyme as you create newverses. Adding some silly words andridiculous images lets your child laugh and giggle while still learningimportant literary lessons. Makea BookMake a picture book with your child. Have them draw pictures or use photos to illustrate stories from theirreal life or create a fictional tale. Howabout creating a scrapbook of your family vacation and having your child writethe captions. AlphabetI SpyISpy something beginning with the letter Play this and other word games that encourage your child to exercisetheir imagination, vocabulary, and grammar skills. TongueTwistersHaveyour child give you adjectives, nouns etc starting with a certain letter and putthem together to form silly tongue twisters. This game encourages imagination and reinforces grammarlessons while still being a fun and silly game that your child can enjoy. Whateveryou choose, do something, anything with your children that encourages reading andthinking. The brain is a muscle, itneeds constant exercise to keep it fit, even in the summer! Backto Top
Moving with Children - One ParentsSurvival Guide for Babies and Preschoolers By Natalie Hanson, MA Most of us can remember moving at least once during ourchildhood. Sometimes a parents job or a divorce sends a family on a newjourney. As an adult, moving has been a way of life for me over the past 15years, mainly due to my husbands medical training. I was finally getting thehang of pulling up roots and relocating with great efficiency then everythingbecame more complicated when our first child arrived two moves ago. Children need a lot of extra attention from caregivers duringa move, but these days it also takes a whole fleet of U-Hauls to transport theirstuff. You know what Im talking about their own furniture, clothes,food, toys, books, strollers, etc. Their things may be only pint-sized,but everything sure seems to add up when moving day rolls around! It is no wonder many parents panic at the prospect of movingwith children. We worry, How will we continue to take care of them, pack upthe house, travel, and move in to a new home and neighborhood without having anervous breakdown? Lets face it, this endeavor would seriously test theskills of Martha Stewart, Dr. Spock, and Barney put together. The good news ischildren are remarkably resilient and can grow in amazing ways during a move. Itcan be a wonderful opportunity for the whole family to work together to achievea common goal creating a new home environment. I do not claim to be an expert, but I have done my share ofmoving, most recently with our two young sons, Hunter (5 years) and Chase (14months). Each child and every age/stage presents a unique challenge. In myopinion, the best thing parents can do for their kids during a move is to beupbeat, positive, and enthusiastic about what lies ahead. (They dont need toknow that we are too tired for words and nervous that the moving company deletedour truck reservation!) Most babies and toddlers thrive on a predictableroutine. The weeks leading up to a move are anything but predictable, so a babysschedule can get turned upside down when parents are busy packing and runningerrands. This certainly is a time to ask for (and accept) help from anycompetent and loving caregiver. Relatives, friends, and professional caregiversare essential to making sure there are no missed feedings or naps and that ayounger child gets plenty of holding time. A swing or TV is no replacementfor a cuddle or reading a book while rocking. Moving also can make a usually childproofed home a source ofpotential danger for very young children. For example, items such as scissors,medications, and cleaning products might be left out instead of stored in theirusual safe cabinet, or gates may not be locked when adults are going downstairsfor the hundredth time to get more boxes. It takes the organizational andsurveillance power of the CIA just to keep track of the little ones under normalcircumstances, but when parents are under stress and the house is a mess, anextra pair of hands is vital for safetys sake. We took advantage of a drop-inoption at our older sons daycare for Chase when we had a lot ofkid-unfriendly activities to do (like meeting with the mortgage company). Also,we stocked up on some luxury items like ready-to-feed formula instead ofpowder as well as extra essentials like more diapers so that we never gotcaught off guard when things got hectic. Remember, time is at a premium, so takeadvantage of time saving products and services when possible. Also, remember this may not be the time to start pottytraining or getting rid of items your child finds comforting and familiar (likea pacifier or favorite blanket). It is perfectly normal for kids to regress alittle during a big transition, so hold off on other high pressure pursuitsuntil you are settled into your new home. Preschoolers also have importantneeds. This is an age when children become more self-sufficient, but justbecause they can dress themselves (color coordination does not count), they maynot be able to communicate how they are feeling. Moving can seem like a veryscary idea to a little person. For us, monsters started showing up at night. Isuggested we put them to work packing boxes, but Hunter insisted they leave. The best way I have found to bring moving down to apreschoolers level is actually to get on their level (Im talkinghands and knees here). I bought a plastic place mat map of the UnitedStates that Hunter and I put star stickers on to show where we were and where wewere moving to. We put the map on the refrigerator so he could get comfortableseeing it every day. Then, we used one of his toy trucks to trace our path. Thismade the move seem very concrete to him. He could actually make thejourney with his hands and eyes rather than just trying to figure everything outin his head. I think putting matters into his own hands (literally) helped easethe transition. Another thing we did about a week before our move was tocreate a paper chain with links leading up to the big day. Hunter got to tearoff a link every day, which helped him count how many days we had left in ourcurrent home. This took away some of his uncertainty about when things actuallywere going to happen. We also planned a party at Hunters preschool so hecould let his friends know he would be leaving. We felt it was important tocreate the opportunity for Hunter to say goodbye to his friends and teachers ina happy, fun environment. It never hurts to remember that those we leave behindare going through a transition, too. We put the pictures from his goodbye partyin a little album he still looks at today. It helps him remember his friends andhis old school, which was very comforting when we had to make all newfriends this summer. We also keep pictures of his old friends on ourrefrigerator (along with the map of our journey). Six months after our move,Hunter still talks about these mementos. Recently, Hunter told us if we move again he wants it to be toDisney World. Believe it or not, we do have another move planned for July. Thistrek will take us to a place we hope to call home for a really long time. It maynot be Disney World, but we hope it will do. So forget the china and crystal our kids are the mostprecious cargo we have to transport. A little extra love and time is great insurancefor a successful move. Backto Top
PottyPlay By Amy Palmer& Melisa Hutchings Pottytraining can be difficult and stressful for you and your toddler. These training tips can help make learning to use the pottyfun for you both. ForBoys Cereal Target. Place a few Cheerios or Fruit Loops in the potty for sinking or targetpractice, this makes potty training boys a little easier and a lot more FUN! Potty Party. Little boys naturally look up to their Daddy. When Dad has to go, have son go too. This can help him feel like a BIG BOY and the bathroom wont be solonely. ForGirls Pretty Potty. Let your daughter decorate her potty seat with paints or stickers. This gives her a chance to create her own SPECIAL potty and can be lotsor fun too. Fancy Pants. Letyour daughter pick out some pretty panties of her own. This encourages her to use the potty and not mess her fancy pants. MorePotty Training Tips! Pick-a-Potty. Let your child pick out his/her own potty seat
Potty Play. Give your child time to become familiar with the potty, let them take itapart and put it back together, sue it as a chair, etc. This will allow them some time to overcome any fears they may have. Place-a-Potty. Allow your child to place their potty in an appropriate place outside ofthe bathroom. (Sometimes the bathroom can be a scary place.) Gradually have your child move the potty to the bathroom. Lots of FUN. Be sure to use lots of encouraging words and praise when theygo on the potty. Getting angry whenyour child has an accident will only make potty training more difficult andfrightening! Remember that one ofthe few things that your child can control is his body. You cant force a child to go on command. They have to want to. Yourgoal is to get your childs cooperation. So loosen up and have fun and think about the day when you can finallysay goodbye to the diapers. Backto Top
"Doctor, How old should my child be when I first bring them in for a check-up?" This is a question dentists are asked quite regularly. The answer can be difficult and is usually subjective in nature. Traditionally, parents were instructed to bring the child in when most or all of the primary teeth were present, usually around age 2. However, in my practice we find emotionally most 2-year-olds are uncomfortable sitting in a dental chair. So in the absence of obvious oral disease I find the following to be a much better approach. Bring the child along with the parent when they visit for a routine cleaning and exam. The child should be present in the treatment room with the parent while the dentist or dental hygienist is performing the cleaning. Activities such as coloring books, handheld video games, and Mr. Potato Head are provided in my office to occupy the child. This allows the child to observe first-hand how easy a routine cleaning can be. Often, as well, we find the child becomes very curious and wants to know exactly what is being done and may even want to look closely into mommy or daddys mouth. Between their natural curiosity and the receptiveness shown by my dental hygienist, it isnt long before the child asks when its going to be their turn. More reluctant children can be weaned into their first visit by having the hygienist count their teeth at one visit, gradually increase to polishing and fluoride treatment, and finally, to any needed x-rays. I have found this regimen to be a "win-win" situation for everyone and actually can get a child excited to come to the dentist every six months. Tips to Get yourKids Brushing Letyour child pick outher own toothbrush and toothpaste. There are many colorful child-sizetoothbrushes on the market, as well as toothpastes in flavors that appeal tokids. One requirement: the toothbrush must have soft, rounded bristles so theydont damage your childs gums. Useonly a pea-sized amount of toothpaste. Kids tend to swallow toothpaste, andits important that they not get too much fluoride. And if your childdoesnt like toothpaste, dont sweat it! Toothpaste isnt really necessaryto good dental hygiene! Praisetheir brushing efforts AND the results theyre producing. Try your teethare so sparkley! or your breath smells minty fresh! Theyll bedelighted that you noticed, and the positive effects of brushing will bereinforced. Trygetting some childrens books about toothbrushing. A few good ones: DragonTeeth and Parrot Beaks Even Creatures Brush Their Teeth, by Almute Grohmann,and Just Going to the Dentist, by Mercer Mayer. Makeup silly toothbrushing songs set to familiar melodies; the songs should includeyour childs name. Easy melodies to try Row, Row, Row Your Boat,The ABC Song, or Mary Had a Little Lamb. Finally,children learn by example. Be sure your child sees you brushing and flossingyour own teeth every single day. Its good for them, and its good for you. Backto Top
Raising Your SpiritedChild by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka,M.A. Book Review Submittedby Rhonda Mordy Ms. Kurcinka, an award-winningeducator in Minnesotas Early Childhood Family Education Program and pioneerof spirited child research has written a wonderful book describing many of ourchildren who many call difficult, stubborn or strong-willed.These children classically are more intense, demanding and energetic. As a parent of such a child, I understand firsthand & felt this was themost profound booka true epiphany! These childrens spirit can easilyoverwhelm parents, leaving them feeling frustrated & inadequate. Spiritedchildren are, in fact, simply more by temperament, they are more intense,sensitive, perceptive, persistent and uncomfortable with change than the averagechild. Through vivid examples and a refreshingly positive viewpoint, Mary SheedyKurcinka offers parents emotional support and proven strategies for handlingtheir spirited child. This book helps parents in five specific areas: 1) Understanding your childs(and your own) temperamental traits 2) Plan for success with a simple four-stepprogram 3) Discover the power of positive (rather than negative) labels 4) Copewith tantrums & blowups when they occur 5) Develop strategies for handlingmealtimes, bedtimes, holidays, school & many other situations. The understanding of your spirited child can be breath-taking with thebooks ease of reading & explanations. I felt like this book wasdescribing my child personally. On good days being their parent ismagical, on bad days they can literally drive you crazy! Their traits willmake them capable & wonderful adults, but as children these same traits aremaddeningyou will come to understand & celebrate that you were chosen tobe their parent! I highly recommend this terrific how-to manual! Back to Top
Summer Solutions By Cheryl Best If youre like most working parents of school age children, the summer months present a special challenge. You want your children to enjoy their summer, but still be safe and properly cared for. What are your summer childcare options? Unless you are lucky enough to have a friend or family member to watch your children, there are two main options for summer care. You can enroll your child in a summer camp program for all or part of the summer or you can hire a temporary Nanny to care for your children at home. Child Care Choices can help families in finding both types of summer childcare. The term "summer camp" includes any facility or program that entertains, enlightens or enriches a childs summer. Camp programs come in all shapes and sizes. Both day and overnight camp programs are available. There are camps with programs in sports, computer, wilderness, music, academic, religious, art and more. The types of programs seem endless. Even a brief search revels hundred of choices in the Delaware Valley alone. Child Care Choices can help you sort through the options and find the camp program that is right for you. We conduct an on-site review of the facility, program and staff. Tell us what you looking for and receive information on all the camp facilities that meet your criteria. Many families prefer to have their child cared for at home, but dont require year round nanny care. A Summer Nanny is the perfect solution. Many college students, teachers, and others are available for summer work. Hiring a summer nanny allows your children to play with their friends, go to the local swim club and other activities while staying close to home during the summer months. Child Care Choices offers a Summer Nanny search service for only $200.00. Of course, summer and temporary Nannies are subject to our rigorous screening process before being included in our network. No matter what type of summer care you choose, start thinking about it now. If you wait until May or June to start your search, you may find your options are severely limited. Most of the good camp programs reach their capacity quickly. Call your local Child Care Choices office for more information. Click here for locations. Back to Top
Leaving your children with ababysitter can be an anxious time. Moreoften than not, the babysitter arrives just a few minutes before you areleaving. Does this sound familiar? You are rushing round getting readywhile shouting instructions to the sitter. You quickly jot down the number where you can be reached and tell her tocall if she has any questions. Yougrab your cell phone and rush out the door to your meeting. On the way there you remember things you wished youd told thebabysitter. Like what to do if thebaby cries when you are pulling away in the car, or what kind of snacks thechildren are allowed, or maybe you forgot to mention that a friend was droppingoff some notes from a meeting you missed. Youtry to concentrate on your meeting, but you are distracted by that naggingfeeling that you forgot to mention something. Tomake the time away from your children more worry free and productive aspossible. Follow these simplesteps. -
Have your babysitter arrive 15-30 minutesprior to when you are to leave. Thiswill give you time to get the children comfortable. -
Review with your babysitter an alreadyprepared organizer on the care of your children. The organizer should include information on emergency and medicalpersonnel names and phone numbers, what to do in case of emergencies, how youare to be contacted and if there are any special needs of the children. Its best if the organizer contains personal information on theindividual child, like how to comfort the child, what the child likes to eat orhow to entertain the child. This will better help the sitter to care for the child. -
Show the sitter where to find the keys tothe house. Identify which key workswhich door. Review the operation ofthe alarm if you have one. Give thesitter the password in case the alarm goes off accidentally. -
Show the sitter where the flashlight, firstaid kit, medical supplies, fire extinguisher, circuit breakers and watershut-off valve are located. Householdemergencies can occur anytime. -
Show the sitter how to operate gates or anyother baby products. Demonstratehow to fold and unfold the stroller or how to work the car seats. -
Review any special procedures for operatingany of your home appliances. Isthere a special way to operate the microwave? -
Describe the childrens expected behaviorand what to do when you actually leave. Shouldthe sitter let the children cry or should she comfort them, give them a pacifieror a blanket, or should she call if the baby will not settle down after acertain period of time. When leaving yourchildren with a babysitter, even if it is your mother, try and follow the sameroutine every time. This iscomforting to the children, the babysitter and the parent. Visit our website at www.kidsklues.com Backto Top
Iwish I had a rich dad like my kids do! How many frustrated parents haveexpressed similar sentiments about how their children mismanage money? It's notuncommon for a teenager to slave away at their job all week, then blow theentire paycheck at the mall in 20 minutes and complain about being broke. Orworse, the money simply gets lost. My nanny could make a respectable living frommoney that goes through the laundry in our children's cloths. Thegood news is children can learn financial responsibility. The bad news is it'sup to us to teach them. Most children and many adults too, don't understand howmoney works or how to use it effectively. Thebest teacher is hands on experience, so talk about money. Providingallowances is an effective way to teach money management skills. In our home Iencourage regular saving by insisting my children put a percentage of everythingthey earn and receive as gifts away into savings. We have assisted them insetting goals for short term and long term purchases and even giving to charity.I've let them make mistakes and learn the lesson of price vs. quality. Wework together in choosing mutual funds and stocks. Not only does this help thechildren and my wife learn about the fundamentals of investing, it also providesa common ground for our family's relationship. Acredit card can be a dangerous weapon in the hands of a teenager, and someadults too. The best way to teach the responsible use of credit cards is tostrictly control use and make sure the children see all the bills that come inand of course pays them off in full at the end of every month. Teachingby example is still the best teacher. Your children do pay attention to what youdo, including how you manage money. So be sure to practice what you preach. Ifyou do a good job managing your finances, your children will probably grow up todo the same. Iwould like to share my experiences with any parent who is interested. You maycontact me to receive a free workbook to start on your way to teaching ageappropriate information to your children.
(215)364-8228 * bshevlin@erols.com Backto Top |